Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Games as Therapy-- Dungeons & Dragons

Objective:
New deficiencies are highlighted as TsukiMoon  our son, ages, so our approach and focus changes to adapt to shifting needs.  What we are helping TsukiMoon with is how to say things to people so that he doesn't cause offense with his caustic; words, intonation, focus.  His delivery needs work.  It is common for him to unknowingly come off harsh to his friends, family, and adults that he meets.  It can be wearing to hear what comes across as abusive, especially at us when we are doing all we can for him.  Some days we are more fragile then others.

Theory:
By playing Dungeons and Dragons (D&D) which is a game of talk, talk, talk.  TsukiMoon practices how to deliver his message.

On The Ground:
My husband, Mr. TsukiMoon  has played lots of D&D in his youthful years.  He is well versed in the world.  Rules have changed over the years to make it easier to play but the premiss hasn't:  Go on adventure, solve problems, help people, get experience which allows your character to become better, get more stuff, and power.  The character you play will progress at the same rate as the others, your friends.  There are nuances between types of characters; warrior vs. mage vs. ranger etc. but all the characters have to rely on the other characters (team mates) to compensate in the areas where yours is weak. For example: a warrior is strong and powerful but not necessarily wise like a priest who can heal the company.

Mr. TsukiMoon acts as the facilitator or game master, called dungeon master (DM) who sets the stage for the world.  The DM talks the players through scenes, sets the goals, and determines fair play or least that is how Mr. TsukiMoon is running it for TsukiMoon and his friend who are both 9 years old.


The boys picked out characters that they wanted to play.  An important part of the way we are setting up the game for the kids is that their characters must be Lawful/Good.  In D&D all creatures fall on a spectrum of alinements and personalities.  Which get broken out into the chart below


Since the boys are constrained by the personality of Lawful/Good, they are not allowed to act outside of that parameter.  Mr. TsukiMoon explains that they can't randomly; steal or attack but must be supportive and helpful.   

The kids had a great time.  We bought them miniatures of the characters that they are playing; paladin and mage, to help them better visualize their people.  Through eBay we got gaming mats to again help them better "see" the space.  Then we got a rudimentary lot of "baddies"; spider, ant, goblin.  For the kids they did all the things that TsukiMoon is weak on; talking, planning, communication of intention, and because of their alignment they had to ask for things respectfully and conduct the characters with decorum.  They both had to modify their initial reactions to a situation to fit with their characters.  All good training.

Some of the characters that the kids played with.  They painted figures themselves.

Here is a fighter that was modified with a crossbow, the secondary weapon strapped (glued) to the back.


As an aside: I look for a good balance between TsukiMoon's behavior around weapons a careful balance.  We have strict rules around the use of weapons; no Nerf guns, water guns.  This applies to other opportunities as well; fencing and archery is a thing that kids do in our area but Mr. TsukiMoon says and emphatic, "No," to anything with a weapon.  That said TsukiMoon loves learning, like most boys, about weaponry.  He watches shows on YouTube all shows about WW2.  He has watched more then once, "Nazi Super Weapons," and "Victory at Sea."  For Christmas he received a book about "Missions of the Mustang," all about the mustang's role in WW2.  He eats this stuff up.  He also wants to play with toy weapons.  We figure that "playing" with fantasy weapons in this world is better then actually shooting the cat or his parents with a really Nerf gun.  We also closely listen to his words he uses about weapons and help him make better word choices or focus.  TsukiMoon is always receptive and wants to please so he quickly corrects his phrasing.

We have played roll-playing games with TsukiMoon in the past; Star Wars, Battlemech, Champions, but this time seemed to go a little better.  TsukiMoon's older, plus we had one of his friends join in.  Another thing that helps kids this age engage is LARGE dice, cute little dice are for adults.  For some reason the kids liked the large dice best.



Mr. TsukiMoon jumped right into the action, one of the reasons that Boo might have been more engaged.  The first action Mr. TsukiMoon took was to asked the kids, "What weapons do you want?"  None of this rules stuff, start with the action and let the rules develop as play continues

The idea of "real" weapons kick started an energetic discussion between the kids of what would be fun, emphasis on 'talk!'  Once the kids decided the weapons we then took the figures that we bought and modified them by adding things like; a shield, crossbow, pike so they would better represent their preferences.  After that they created thier character sheets; how strong, smart, competent, dexterous, and so on.  The kids loved the whole process.

The nice thing about D&D is that unlike the Star Wars role-playing game where you kill humans or humanoids in your adventures, in D&D you can kill things like; slime and spiders, which better aligns  with our beliefs. 

ASD is a strange thing, TsukiMoon is very loving, loves hugs, holds my hand and gives me kisses and says, "Mommy you look like you need a hug," but has difficulty understanding motivations of people.  For instance TsukiMoon's speech and language pathologist is reading Rold Dahl's James and the Giant Peach with him.  In the first chapter, heck the first page, TsukiMoon had a challenge understanding why James was happy living with his parents, living on the beach and was unhappy when James moved in with Spiker and Sponge.  It is because of this weak understanding of people's desires and joys that we have to create an environment that embraces; positivity, empathy, and love (to the best of our ability).  When things come up that don't meet this standard; Ferguson, Ebola, beheadings, we work to try to explain these things with the most empathy for the people involved; both victims and perpetrators, as possible.  The goal is that TsukiMoon will feel empathy, through role modeling, when bad things happen to good people or even for less then "good" people.  

In a way that is what we are trying to do in D&D.  The game is a place to practice being a "hero" and make a better choice.  


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