Homework-- Challenges for Mama

Sometimes I get a taste of what parents of neurotypical children must feel.  Some situations feel so universal that all parents must surely go through it.  Of course I wouldn't really know because we only have one child with ASD and I was also an only only child so I can't compare anything about childhood to what is typical to other children. 

Today it was an argument about getting homework done.  I don't want to be the one who drives homework to be finished but sometimes that's what end up happening.  I hate that, it only leads to anger and frustration on both sides; mother and son never end up happy.  On the bright side it feels very normal topic to get upset about.  I would guess that all parents, at some point, roll their eyes over the beloved topic of homework.  

I am happy to say school homework TsukiMoon is self driven.  He does a great job of quickly doing his homework before doing most other things, except reading.  Eventually he decides he has read enough and gets the work done.  Great! I have "school issues" leftover from my time in halls of ivy.  A continual C/B student, who always wanted to do better but didn't know how, I had wanted TsukiMoon to excel to make up for my deficits.  Since the diagnosis that has gone away.  Mostly.  It still comes up in an ugly way around homework.  It is best if I just steer clear of all homework.  The dust-up today was about uncompleted social homework.

TsukiMoon goes to a social class every week.  My understanding that there is not good evidence that social classes work to help children make friends.  We go because we don't know what else to do in addition to everything else.  We try everything we can.

he assignment this week was everyday to write down a feeling felt that day followed by the body sensations that go with that feeling.  A good assignment, I could apply to myself and when I get upset about homework.  ;-)  He hadn't done any of it and I hit the roof.  Really this is fear on my part that he won't become more skilled socially.  He doesn't deserve this anger, in fact it makes him his symptoms worse.

So much of parenting a child with ASD is about managing my own emotions.  To give TsukiMoon the best of me.  Of course learning to manage my emotions is important in every situation, when I don't it feels like I've just donated another pound of flesh to the cause.  It feels terrible.  No wonder sleep is elusive for me.  I keep at it, with the steady drum beat of: I must do better.