For spring break we got an Airbnb in San Francisco for an easy break. It was 3 quick nights in the city, but it was much needed down time for all. We live close to the city, and even as some people commute to the city, for us it is a bit too far for an easy hang-out. Most of our trips have been to do something specific, then come back home. It was nice to wake up in the city and immediately get out the door.
As much as it would be nice to go to a enjoy a resort, they are so easy, like they should be-- they are that way by design, it doesn't expand TsukiMoon's abilities. He needs to be able to have lots of practice in new challenges. Navigating a city we barely know was a challenge for everyone, but that is good, that is the point. It is hard for him to see his parents trying to figure out how to get around, make mistakes, and solve them. We roll model for him how to structure a day when there is no, to little knowledge of place, yet we still need to accomplish navigation and feeding ourselves, and possibly find something fun to do.
TsukiMoon is much better then when he was younger; verbal, calmer. Thank God he doesn't bite anymore-- that was tough. As rough as it was no one ever saw an issue: he was a problem instead of there being an issue. Maybe we would have him checked out earlier then at 7 but there was very little money at that time. So many regrets, but a lot went right too.
I told my husband that I had no goals for our San Francisco holiday. I wanted to wander slowly around the city. Which we did, walking 10 miles or more each day. It was a trial for TsukiMoon to walk the distance but that was easier then the exposure to just new things. Every new site was a struggle to the senses.
TsukiMoon can get stuck in a loop where there is only one way to do something. This meant that my objective of easy exploration and his were at odds. Ultimately this is a good thing. TsukiMoon needs to learn how to be flexible and accepting of others. There were some tough moments. On top of the incessant pushing to monitor all of his parents actions, he feels he needs to keep us inline. Parents have this annoying habit of going off script. He challenged any ideas for the next curiosity. This was all too much and he starts his frequent touching, prodding, and hanging on us.
Eventually my husband and I felt poked. It maxed our bump-factor. So called "down-time" aka vacation, becomes work. That's ok of course because we are his parents, this is our job. Luckily we have each other to break-down to and pick up the slack when the other needs a break from TsukiMoon. We couldn't do this without the other. If we both need a break that's a good time for a screen or to make a pit-stop at Starbucks.
A quick moment to sing the praises of our relationship. I would have broken with out Mr. TsukiMoon. I got PTSD from taking care of TsukiMoon when he was younger and that, lack of sleep, and not knowing what was going on, caused a break down about every 18 months where I would need to ask for help. Mr. TsukiMoon was always there. The same thing goes for me, Mr. TsukiMoon works 80 hour weeks then comes home and dedicates his time to giving Boo all the attention that he requires. Sometimes even he, who has amazing reserves can start to crack.
Ultimately this level of fun adventure creates change. TsukiMoondoes become more flexible, better at talking with strangers, and being in new places. Autism is part of this family but it doesn't have to rule our clan.
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